Tag Archives: magic

lethargy & optimism

Every November, I experience a particular, familiar fatigue, the same repetitive thoughts from the year before. It is the season when chronic suicidal ideation strengthens, when it takes root and rapidly solidifies itself in my brain, my blood, my heart … Continue reading

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friendship, jealousy, & fear of being forgotten

I’ve been grappling with the idea of paranoia as an intense expression of one’s fear of being abandoned or forgotten. I am thinking of abandonment as an experience that happens to one before they have learned how to speak, and … Continue reading

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let yr freak flag fly: on recovery, feelings, magic, & Tarot

Throughout my recovery, I’ve been reconnecting with my teenage self. I still have some objects that were in my bedroom when I was thirteen. I have the first book about witchcraft I’d ever read and practiced from, some little stones … Continue reading

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befriending myself

I feel like I’m in the midst of recovering from emotional / spiritual / physical / creative burnout, and I’m not sure which direction I wanna wander next, but I’m happy to have made it to this place. Now that … Continue reading

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just another genderqueer femme with a cane

I got a cane today! I’m pretty excited about it because it’s already making walking a whole lot easier for me. My chronic pain condition has been progressing, and I knew this was inevitable, but I kept putting off buying … Continue reading

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Things I’ve Tried to Stay Alive

content warning: self-injury, suicide, overdoses, sexual assault I’ve made myself extremely vulnerable over the years with the details & stories I’ve shared in my zines & on my blog. I feel like I’ve over-shared to an immense degree, but it … Continue reading

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Dear Depression: Thank You

A letter for depression, the illness that tries to kill me and, strangely, gives me reasons to stay alive, too. Depression, thank you for helping me recognize when I need to step back and take care of myself, to temporarily … Continue reading

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L.A. & all her crazy charms.

When I left for tour, the most precious item I brought with me was a blank journal. I filled these pages with stories, notes, details, plans, ideas; I glued in fliers, receipts, stickers, business cards, lists; and I pressed between … Continue reading

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New Zine! Real Life: A Magical Guide to Getting Off the Internet.

Real Life: A Magical Guide to Getting Off the Internet is a how-to and story-telling zine by me and my friend Dave Cave. We both realized we’d been spending way too much time online, and that we always ended up … Continue reading

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The Kindness of Strangers, and the Search for a Potentially Healing Community

I have a tendency to think that the whole world and everyone in it is inherently good when I stumble upon one kind stranger, and to think the entire opposite when I stumble upon a particularly unpleasant stranger. I recently … Continue reading

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